Jan. 21, 2025

From Doubt to Daring: Building Confidence in Your Next Chapter

From Doubt to Daring: Building Confidence in Your Next Chapter

Show Notes:

Summary:

Midlife insecurity is more than just a feeling; it's an invitation to grow and transform. Valerie and her co-host dive deep into the common sources of insecurity that many face during this phase of life, including concerns about appearance, relevance, and life transitions. They discuss practical strategies to reframe negative thoughts and embrace change with curiosity rather than fear. By focusing on personal strengths and celebrating small wins, listeners can build confidence that grows stronger with each decision they make. Ultimately, this episode encourages everyone to recognize that every doubt faced is an opportunity to discover inner strength and to own this remarkable chapter of life.

Timestamps:

00:00 Valerie introduces the topic of insecurity in midlife.

01:01 Discusses societal pressures and their impact.

07:05 Offers practical steps to reframe negative thoughts.

09:05 Guides on building confidence through action.

11:28 Summarizes the discussion and gives closing remarks.

Key Takeaways:

Reframe negative thoughts by shifting the focus from feelings of inadequacy to growth opportunities, enhancing your mindset and fostering self-improvement.

Focus on your strengths, listing unique qualities and revisiting them to counteract insecurity and bolster self-confidence.

Embrace change with curiosity rather than fear, viewing transitions as openings for new possibilities and personal growth.

Celebrate small wins and practice positive self-talk, replacing "I can't" with "I'm learning" to build confidence steadily.

Surround yourself with supportive individuals, ensuring that your circle consists of people who lift you up and believe in your potential.

Let's connect:

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Find me on Facebook, Instagram, and Threads @iamvaleriehatcher.  

 Have questions, comments or feedback? Email hello@agingwithgraceandstyle.com

Join Us Next Time:

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Stay tuned for more inspiring chats, tips, and stories about the midlife journey.

See you soon!

Transcript
Valerie

Let's be honest, we've all been there.


Valerie

That little voice in your head whispers, am I enough?


Valerie

Whether it's about your appearance, your relevance, or your abilities, insecurity has a sneaky way of showing up.


Valerie

But here's the thing.


Valerie

Midlife isn't the time to shrink back.


Valerie

It's the time to rise.


Speaker B

Today, we're talking about how to overcome.


Valerie

Insecurity and embrace the incredible confidence that comes with this date.


Speaker B

Hey, girl.


Speaker B

Welcome to the Aging with Grace and.


Valerie

Style podcast, the place where we celebrate.


Speaker B

Midlife and beyond with grace, style, unapologetic.


Valerie

Confidence, and a touch of sass.


Valerie

I'm Valerie and I am so glad that you're here.


Valerie

This episode is for anyone who's ever felt held back by self doubt.


Valerie

And let's be real, that's all of us at some point.


Valerie

So grab a cup of tea, I have my drink, or whatever else that you like to drink.


Speaker B

Settle in and let's tackle this together.


Valerie

Today we'll explore why insecurity tends to creep in during middle midlife, how to identify the thoughts that hold us back, and most importantly, practical ways to build the kind of confidence that allows us.


Speaker B

To step boldly into this next chapter.


Valerie

So if you think about it, insecurity doesn't just pop up out of nowhere.


Valerie

It's often rooted in experiences, in expectations, and, let's be honest, societal pressures and midlife.


Valerie

It's like a magnifying glass on all of it.


Valerie

Changes in our bodies, shifts in our careers, evolving relationships, family dynamics.


Speaker B

They all challenge our sense of self.


Valerie

And here are some common sources of insecurity.


Valerie

Appearance.


Valerie

Let's talk about that mirror for a moment.


Valerie

Gray hairs, wrinkles, body changes.


Valerie

They're natural, but they're not easy to accept.


Valerie

I don't know that any of us.


Speaker B

Are immune to the initial feelings when.


Valerie

These things kind of creep up on us.


Valerie

I remember how I felt when I saw my first gray hair or gray hairs, or when I saw wrinkles across my forehead, or when I started to gain weight because of hormones and menopause.


Valerie

My first thoughts were, dang, is this what aging is like?


Valerie

I am getting old now while I still get my hair colored.


Valerie

I don't freak out anymore if I see some gray hairs pop in and the weight gain.


Valerie

Well, some lifetime lifestyle changes helped with that.


Speaker B

It helped me to understand how my body was changing.


Speaker B

And age did have some effect.


Valerie

But there were some things that I could do.


Valerie

But the beauty industry, it doesn't help.


Speaker B

It's constantly telling us to fight the clock these days.


Valerie

I'm just happy that the clock is still ticking.


Valerie

And then there's relevance.


Valerie

Have you ever felt like the world is moving so fast and you're not sure where you fit in?


Valerie

So whether it's technology trends or just.


Speaker B

Keeping up with younger generations, midlife can make us question our value.


Valerie

But we shouldn't.


Valerie

You know, I'm a big believer of continuous learning.


Speaker B

We can control our relevance by continuing to learn new things.


Valerie

Do we need to be experts?


Speaker B

No, we don't.


Valerie

But we should have some kind of working knowledge.


Speaker B

Taking time to figure things out not.


Valerie

Only helps us with relevance, but it keeps our brain sharp.


Valerie

I recently had a conversation with someone who is much younger than me, and she doesn't know how to do some things that, to me are basic.


Valerie

But for me, it's really not about the fact that she doesn't know how to do them.


Valerie

It's more that she doesn't take the initiative to learn and would rather say, I.


Valerie

I don't know how.


Speaker B

I'm too old.


Valerie

And we wonder why society treats us as they do.


Valerie

I know we're talking about us women, but I know some guys who also deal with this who would rather say, I'm not keeping up or I'm too old than to sit and spend the time just learning the basics of some things.


Valerie

And then we have life transitions, emptiness, career pivots, or even retirement.


Speaker B

These changes can leave us wondering, what's next?


Valerie

Does any of this resonate with you?


Valerie

Have you found yourself avoiding something?


Valerie

A new opportunity, a social event, even looking in the mirror because of insecurity?


Valerie

If so, you're not alone.


Valerie

And we're going to unpack this together.


Valerie

What if I told you that insecurity isn't a sign of weakness, it's actually an invitation to grow.


Valerie

When we feel insecure, it's often because we're stepping outside of our comfort zone or we're facing a change.


Valerie

And both of those, they bring opportunities for transformation.


Valerie

So how do we shift the way we look at insecurity?


Valerie

It starts with reframing those negative thoughts and recognizing the strengths that we often overlook in ourselves.


Valerie

So let's talk about a few practical ways to do just this.


Speaker B

Challenge the narrative.


Valerie

Instead of thinking, I'm not enough, try asking, what am I learning from this experience?


Valerie

Shift the focus from inadequacy to growth.


Speaker B

Every new challenge, no matter how daunting it holds a lesson that equips us for the future.


Valerie

And then focus on strengths.


Valerie

Think about everything you bring to the table.


Valerie

Your experiences, your wisdom, your resilience These are things that no one else can replicate.


Valerie

Take a moment to list your unique.


Speaker B

Qualities and revisit them whenever these insecurities creep in.


Speaker B

And then embrace change.


Valerie

Change can feel like loss, but it's also an opening to something new.


Valerie

What if we approach change with curiosity instead of fear?


Valerie

Ask yourself, what possibilities does this change present?


Valerie

For instance, let's say you're transitioning into a new role or a phase of life.


Valerie

Instead of dwelling on what you're leaving behind, think about what you're stepping into.


Valerie

It might be an opportunity to learn a new skill, to meet new people, or to rediscover parts of yourself that have been dormant.


Valerie

Or consider physical changes.


Valerie

Instead of critiquing your appearance, celebrate what your body has carried you through, the strength that is shown you, and the life that is lived.


Valerie

I remember a time when I almost didn't apply for a new role because I thought, what if I'm not qualified?


Valerie

But then I realized the only way I was going to find out was to step up.


Speaker B

So I reframed my fear as an opportunity to grow.


Valerie

And you know what?


Valerie

I got the role and it has been one of the most rewarding experiences of my life.


Valerie

So think about one area of your life where insecurity is holding you back.


Valerie

What's one step, however small it may be, that you can take today to reframe that doubt?


Valerie

Remember, every shift in perspective brings the foundation for greater confidence.


Valerie

Now that we've defined insecurity and we've explored ways to shift our mindset, it's time to take action.


Valerie

Confidence isn't just about how we think, it's about what we do.


Valerie

So let's dive into some practical steps that you can start implementing today to build the kind of confidence that grows stronger with every decision that you make.


Valerie

First would be celebrate small wins.


Valerie

Confidence isn't built overnight, it's built one small win at a time.


Valerie

So did you speak up in a meeting or did you try something new?


Valerie

If so, celebrate that and then practice positive self talk.


Valerie

Replace negative thoughts with affirmations.


Valerie

Instead of I can't try, say I'm learning or I'm growing.


Valerie

Surround yourself with encouragement.


Valerie

Who's in your corner?


Valerie

Spend time with those people.


Valerie

My pastor recently wrote a social media post and it was, if I recall correctly, entitled who's in your circle versus who's in your corner?


Valerie

And and it talked about there is a difference.


Valerie

Not everybody in our circle is going to be in our corner and we.


Speaker B

Need to be intentional about who we.


Valerie

Have in our corner.


Speaker B

And I totally agree with that.


Valerie

We should spend time with people who are going to lift us up and people who believe in our potential, and then take action despite fear.


Valerie

Confidence doesn't mean that you're never afraid.


Valerie

It means that you move forward anyway.


Speaker B

Start small, but the key is to.


Valerie

Start When I look back on my life, the moments that I'm most proud of weren't the ones where I felt 100% confident.


Valerie

They were the ones that I took a leap despite my doubts.


Speaker B

So what's one small win that you.


Valerie

Can create for yourself this week?


Valerie

Maybe it's trying something new, setting a boundary, or simply just looking in the mirror and saying I'm enough.


Valerie

Today we explored the roots of midlife insecurity.


Speaker B

We reframed it as an opportunity for.


Valerie

Growth and shared practical steps to build confidence.


Valerie

Insecurity doesn't define you, it challenges you to rise.


Valerie

Remember, every doubt you face is an invitation to discover your strength.


Valerie

You are more than enough and this chapter of life is yours to own.


Valerie

So if this episode resonated with you, share it with a friend who might need some encouragement and let's connect on social media.


Valerie

You can reach me at IamValerie Hatcher on all platforms.


Valerie

I would love to hear how you're building confidence in your life.


Valerie

Until next time, keep rising, keep growing and keep shining.


Valerie

Take care of yourself and embrace the incredible person that you are.


Speaker B

Thanks for hanging out with me today.


Speaker B

If you love this episode, do me.


Valerie

A favor, share it with a friend.


Speaker B

And leave a quick review.


Valerie

It's a small thing that makes a big difference.


Valerie

Don't forget to subscribe so you never miss an episode.


Valerie

And hey, let's keep the conversation going.


Valerie

Join me at pod.agingwithgraceinstyle.com for more tips, stories and a whole lot of connection.


Valerie

Until next time, keep shining with grace, style and a touch of sassy.