Reclaiming Joy: Why Fun is Essential After 50

Show Notes:
Summary:
Fun isn’t just a luxury; it’s essential, especially as we navigate the exciting adventures of midlife! Today, we’re diving into why joy, play, and all those giggles we used to have aren’t just nice-to-haves—they’re downright necessary for our well-being. We’ve all been there, right? Juggling responsibilities and forgetting to pencil in some good old-fashioned fun. But let me tell you, when we skip the fun, everything feels heavier, and that’s no way to live! So, grab your favorite drink—be it coffee, tea, or something a bit sparkly—and let’s chat about how we can reclaim joy in our lives, because trust me, we don’t age out of needing fun; we just need to make room for it!
Timestamps:
00:01 - The Importance of Laughter
00:33 - The Importance of Joy and Fun in Midlife
06:18 - Finding Joy in Our Schedules
07:23 - Overcoming Barriers to Joy
11:22 - Reclaiming Fun: A Necessity for Joy
Key Takeaways:
- Recognize and reject the "invisible woman" stereotype by embracing your experiences as sources of strength and vitality.
- Focus on internal confidence and self-acceptance over external appearances to authentically project your presence and charisma.
- Adjust your posture and speaking habits to convey confidence; sit tall, use clear, intentional speech, and avoid ending statements as if they are questions.
- Continuously challenge negative self-talk by affirming the value of your experiences and the validity of your contributions.
- Observe and emulate the subtle qualities of individuals who exemplify strong presence to enhance your own demeanor while maintaining your authenticity.
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Let me ask you something.
Speaker BWhen was the last time you laughed.
Speaker ASo hard your stomach hurt or did.
Speaker BSomething just because it made you happy, not because it was productive or responsible or expected?
Speaker BSomewhere along the way, a lot of.
Speaker AUs stopped prioritizing fun.
Speaker BWe became caretakers, workers, problem solvers, plate.
Speaker ASpinners, and fun that got bumped to the bottom of the list.
Speaker ABut here's the truth.
Speaker AFun isn't frivolous.
Speaker AIt's fuel.
Speaker AAnd today we're talking about why joy, play, and lightness aren't just nice to have after 50, they're necessary.
Speaker CLiving our Best Life it's good to be alive, but it's best to truly let your spirit fly.
Speaker CSo celebrate the journey every single day.
Speaker CAging with Grace and style in our own special way.
Speaker BWelcome to Aging with Grace and Style, the podcast that reminds.
Speaker AYou Midlife isn't the end of your story.
Speaker AIt's the start of your next most vibrant chapter.
Speaker AValerie I'm your host, Valerie, and around.
Speaker BHere we talk about what it means.
Speaker ATo show up fully, love ourselves deeply.
Speaker BAnd live with unapologetic joy and confidence at every age.
Speaker BThis is part two of my Real.
Speaker ATalk plus Real Life series.
Speaker BThree episodes focused on the things that.
Speaker AWe carry, question, and crave in midlife.
Speaker AIn part one, we talked about body image, health, and emotional pressure in the weight of it all.
Speaker AIf you missed it, be sure to go back and catch that one.
Speaker BToday we're shifting into something a little.
Speaker ALighter but just as important, and that's called joy.
Speaker ABecause fun isn't optional, it's essential.
Speaker BSo grab your coffee, your tea, or.
Speaker AYour glass of something sparkly, and let's.
Speaker BTalk about how to bring more fun back into your everyday life.
Speaker AWe don't age out of needing fun.
Speaker AWe don't outgrow joy, and we definitely.
Speaker BDon'T need anyone's permission to play.
Speaker ASo let's get into it.
Speaker AWhy we stopped having fun, what's costing what it's costing us, and how to.
Speaker BReclaim that joy again.
Speaker AIf I asked you what fun looked like in your 20s or 30s, you.
Speaker BCould probably rattle off a list.
Speaker AI know I could.
Speaker BBut now many of us pause.
Speaker AWe say things like, I don't have.
Speaker BTime, girl, I am too tired.
Speaker BOr there's just too much to do.
Speaker BAnd let me be clear, I totally get it.
Speaker ALife is full for me.
Speaker AI'm juggling a lot.
Speaker AWork, church, responsibility, supporting my mom, keeping up with the podcast.
Speaker AIt's a lot.
Speaker BAnd yes, some days, fun feels like a luxury.
Speaker ABut here's what I've realized when I.
Speaker BStop Making space for joy.
Speaker AEverything feels heavier.
Speaker AI become resentful.
Speaker AI'm more drained.
Speaker BI am pretty darn grouchy.
Speaker AAnd honestly, I'm less me.
Speaker AHere's a reflection prompt.
Speaker BWhen.
Speaker AWhen's the last time that you felt pure, unfiltered joy?
Speaker AWhat were you doing?
Speaker AAnd then I guess a big question is, why did you stop doing it?
Speaker AYou know how we talk about mental health, physical health, and emotional health?
Speaker AWell, let's add joy health to the list.
Speaker AFun boost mood, it lowers stress, it increases creativity, and it reconnects us to our aliveness.
Speaker BIn fact, research shows that engaging in.
Speaker ALeisure activities is linked to lower blood.
Speaker BPressure, lower cortisol, better sleep, and even stronger immune function.
Speaker BFun is not silly.
Speaker AIt's strategic.
Speaker AIt's not something to squeeze in.
Speaker AIt's something to schedule in.
Speaker ASo here's an example.
Speaker BA friend of mine recently started taking salsa classes at 58.
Speaker AShe said, I was nervous at first, but the music, the people, the movement, it woke something up in me.
Speaker BThat's what fun does.
Speaker AIt wakes us up.
Speaker BSo if you're not sure where to.
Speaker AStart, here are a few fun ideas to try this month.
Speaker AYou could join a beginner's dance class or a yoga class or a painting class.
Speaker BMaybe host a grown woman game night.
Speaker AThat could include dominoes, charades, snacks and.
Speaker BMusic and a bunch of laughter.
Speaker ATake yourself to a matinee or a solo lunch.
Speaker ATry a new coffee shop or a.
Speaker BSmoothie place, or walk through a bookstore.
Speaker BPlay your favorite throwback playlist and just dance in the kitchen.
Speaker AOr start a low pressure hobby like maybe a puzzle or sketching or thrifting.
Speaker ATake a day trip just to explore.
Speaker BNo agenda needed.
Speaker BJust hang out.
Speaker BPlan a solo yes day where you.
Speaker ASay yes to anything that's joyful or low stakes.
Speaker AJoy doesn't have to be big, it.
Speaker BJust has to be intentional.
Speaker ASo grab your calendar right now, pause it if you have to, and ask where is my joy Schedule, not task, not appointments.
Speaker AJoy start with just one moment this.
Speaker BWeek and then build from there.
Speaker AI did the same exercise.
Speaker AI looked at my calendar and I'm going to be honest, I didn't have any joy scheduled on my calendar.
Speaker AEverything was task.
Speaker BThis is what I need to do.
Speaker ATo get this out.
Speaker AThis is what I need.
Speaker AThese are the meetings I have.
Speaker BBut then I added a couple of things.
Speaker ASo one thing that was added is, was a women's event, rather at our church it's a pottery making event and.
Speaker BThe other is in a few weeks.
Speaker AA couple's bowling outing that's joy.
Speaker BThat's going to be fun.
Speaker BAnd so now you do the same.
Speaker ACheck your calendar.
Speaker AIf you don't have anything on there, then add something.
Speaker AYou can always find some joy.
Speaker BThere's some good movies out.
Speaker BSo pick a movie.
Speaker BJust do something.
Speaker ANow, let's name the obstacles so we can move past them.
Speaker ASo let's say barriers.
Speaker ABarrier number one.
Speaker AI feel guilty.
Speaker AWe've been taught to be selfless, to work hard, to earn rest and pleasure.
Speaker BBut joy doesn't have to be earned.
Speaker AJoy should be your birthright.
Speaker BSo try this.
Speaker AReframe.
Speaker AWhen I prioritize fun, I come back.
Speaker BTo my responsibilities more energized and present.
Speaker ABarrier number two.
Speaker AI don't know what I enjoy anymore.
Speaker BNow, this one is real.
Speaker BAfter decades of caring for others, we sometimes forget what we like.
Speaker ASo start by thinking, what did I enjoy as a child?
Speaker ANow, it might not be the same thing that you enjoy now, but that gives you some point of reference.
Speaker BOr what brings me peace or laughter.
Speaker ANow, what's something that I've always been curious about?
Speaker AThen try one small experiment a week.
Speaker BNo pressure.
Speaker AYou're just going through discovery at this point.
Speaker BBarrier three.
Speaker AI don't have anyone to do it with.
Speaker AYou don't need permission or a plus one to enjoy yourself.
Speaker BTake yourself out.
Speaker ALaugh by yourself.
Speaker BBe your own date.
Speaker AThat's not lonely.
Speaker BIt's powerful.
Speaker BI'm going to be honest.
Speaker ASome of my most fun moments.
Speaker AI love being with my girls.
Speaker AI love being with my husband.
Speaker ABut I also love being with me.
Speaker AIt could be just going to a.
Speaker BCoffee bar.
Speaker AShopping, or even just turning.
Speaker BOn some music and having a dance party.
Speaker AThat's joy.
Speaker BSome of my favorite memories, as I.
Speaker ASaid, come from doing the simple things.
Speaker BLike walking through a park, getting dressed just for me, watching a show with.
Speaker ANo guilt, having a dance party.
Speaker AThat quiet joy is real joy, too.
Speaker ASo let me tell you something.
Speaker AThe women that I admire the most aren't just wise or successful.
Speaker AThey're joyful.
Speaker BThey laugh loudly.
Speaker BThey show up as themselves.
Speaker AThey've stopped asking for permission.
Speaker BThat's what I want us to do.
Speaker BAging out loud means saying yes to.
Speaker AWhat feels good, letting yourself be seen.
Speaker BLaughing from the belly, choosing clay.
Speaker BEven in the midst of hard seasons, fun doesn't cancel out your responsibility.
Speaker AIt helps you carry them better.
Speaker AI got a DM from a listener who said val.
Speaker BI started doing Taco Tuesday solo at this little spot in town.
Speaker BI used to wait for someone to.
Speaker AGo with, but now it's my thing.
Speaker BAnd honestly, it's the best part of my week.
Speaker AThat right there.
Speaker AThat's what aging out loud looks like.
Speaker ASo your challenge for the week is to plan one thing just for fun.
Speaker AIt can be small, it can be totally silly.
Speaker AIt can be solo.
Speaker ABut do it on purpose and watch what shifts.
Speaker BTry this joy ritual.
Speaker AThis week, pick your joy song, which could be a throwback that gets you dancing your joy outfit, the thing that.
Speaker BYou feel good in, not just presentable.
Speaker AA joy action, even 10 minutes of something you love.
Speaker AJoy is a spiritual practice, and you deserve to practice it often.
Speaker ASo we've talked today about reclaiming fun not as a reward, but as a necessity.
Speaker AYou don't need to be younger or freer or thinner to enjoy your life.
Speaker BYou just need to give yourself permission to live it.
Speaker ASo this week, I hope you laugh louder, I hope you dance longer and.
Speaker BSay yes to joy without guilt.
Speaker ABecause you're not too old and you're not too busy.
Speaker AYou're right on time for the kind of fun that fills you up.
Speaker AThis episode is part two of my Real Talk Real Life series, where we're being honest about what we need as women over 50.
Speaker ANext week, we're wrapping up the series with you're not the only one.
Speaker AIt's a conversation about the things that.
Speaker BWe secretly google and silently wonderful.
Speaker AAnd let me tell you, you are not alone.
Speaker BIf this episode spoke to you, then.
Speaker ATag a friend or send it her way.
Speaker ASometimes joy just needs an invitation, and this could be hers.
Speaker AUntil next time, Keep shining, keep playing.
Speaker BAnd keep aging out loud with grace.
Speaker AStyle and a touch of satin.
Speaker AThanks for hanging out with me today.
Speaker AIf you love this episode, do me a fav, share it with a friend and leave a quick review.
Speaker AIt's a small thing that makes a big difference.
Speaker ADon't forget to subscribe so you never miss an episode.
Speaker AAnd hey, let's keep the conversation going.
Speaker AJoin me@podagingwithgraceandstyle.com for more tips, stories, and.
Speaker BA whole lot of connection.
Speaker AUntil next time, Keep shining.
Speaker AWith grace, style, and a touch of sass, it.