Show Notes:
In this episode of "Aging with Grace & Style," host Valerie Hatcher discusses the importance of mental well-being for women over 50. She explores how societal narratives about aging can be reframed to appreciate wisdom and growth. Valerie offers insights on cultivating a growth mindset, practicing gratitude, and challenging limiting beliefs through cognitive restructuring. She emphasizes the power of self-talk, self-compassion, and positive affirmations in fostering a healthy mindset. The episode also addresses major life transitions like the empty nest and retirement, providing tips for coping with identity shifts and embracing new opportunities for personal growth.
Timestamps:
00:00 Introduction to mental well-being for women over 50
01:05 Embracing aging with wisdom and resilience
04:54 Challenging and reframing limiting beliefs
06:19 Implementing cognitive restructuring for mental wellness
12:20 Navigating life transitions like the empty nest phase
13:17 Preparing emotionally for the retirement phase
0:14:24 Coping with identity shifts and an empty nest
16:52 Transitioning to a second act with self-compassion
18:15 Recap of top strategies for mental health care
19:23 Encouragement for nurturing mental well-being
Key Takeaways:
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Hey there. As you know, May is Mental
Health Awareness Month. And today, we're going
to talk about a topic that's incredibly
important for us women over 50, and that's
taking care of our mental well-being.
Hey, friend. Ever feel like those old fashioned
ideas about aging just don't fit you? If you're ready to
own this incredible chapter with grace, style, and a touch of
sass, this is your space. Welcome to the aging with
grace and style podcast. I'm Valerie Hatcher, and I'm here with empowering tips, inspiring stories,
and a whole lot of fun just for us,
women over 50. So grab your favorite beverage, turn
up the volume, and let's get started.
Whether you're navigating the empty nest,
approaching retirement, or simply going
through a major life transition, This stage of
life can bring up a whirlwind of
emotions and challenges. But you know what?
Girl, we got this. And I'm
here with some insights that might help you to
thrive. So let's start by
addressing the narratives and mindset surrounding
aging. Society often tells
us that our best years are behind us, but
that couldn't be further from the truth. This stage of
life is a time of immense wisdom,
resilience, and unique perspectives that
only come with experience.
Instead of viewing aging as a process of
decline, we can choose to see it as a
journey of growth, wisdom, and newfound
freedoms. For example, many women
over 50 report feeling a sense of liberation
from societal pressures and external
expectations, allowing them to focus on
what truly matters to them. This stage of life
can be a time of self discovery
where we shed limiting beliefs and embrace our
true authentic selves. The key
is to cultivate a
growth mindset, the belief that that our
abilities and our potential are not fixed
but can continually grow and
evolve with effort and perseverance. Now
this mindset shift, it can be empowering, opening
up us up to new possibilities
and opportunities for personal growth.
Another tool in our mental health
toolkit is gratitude. By
actively gratitude and and focusing
on the positive aspects of our lives, we
can shift our perspective and and
cultivate a sense of appreciation and
contentment. So a gratitude
exercise that you can do is, if you haven't
already done so, start a gratitude journal. I
have one. Now I don't use it every day, but
I can tell when I need to pull it out and when I need
to reflect on what I'm grateful for.
So what you can do is each day, write
down, say, 3 to 5 things that you're grateful for.
These can be big or small from, like,
feeling healthy to appreciating a beautiful
sunset. If you want to add
on to that, you can reflect on
why you're grateful for each of those things. That kinda
deepens the impact. So for example,
I'm grateful for my morning cup of coffee and my
quiet time. It's a small ritual that
really helps me to start my day. So starting
your day by focusing on what you appreciate
can have an impact on your mindset and your
overall well-being. Now
let's talk about limiting beliefs that that can hold us
back. I'm guessing many of us have
them or at one point or another have had
them, whether it's feeling invisible,
doubting our capabilities, or telling ourselves
we're too old for certain pursuits.
These self limiting beliefs can be damaging to our
mental well-being. Trust me. I've
experienced self limiting beliefs with
thoughts like I'm not as good as other content
creators or podcasters or will people even listen
to what I have to say or even do
I have anything to say? Those are just
a couple of them. The good news is that we
have the power to challenge and reframe
these negative thought patterns. One technique
that I've been following is called cognitive
restructuring, where we examine our thoughts
objectively and replace them with
more realistic perspectives. So, for instance,
one exercise is called the thought record,
and here's how it works. 1st, we
identify the negative thought or belief that's
causing you to distress. For example, I'm too
old to start a new career. Next, challenge that
thought by asking yourself, is this thought
based on facts or assumptions?
What's the evidence for and against this
thought? Or am I blowing
things out of proportion? Then come up
with alternative, more balanced thoughts,
such as age is just a number
and many successful people have started new careers later in
life, or my experience and wisdom are
valuable assets that can benefit a new
field. Then take
action based on your new, more realistic
perspective. Perhaps
you research inspiring stories of career changers
over 50 or maybe schedule
informational interviews in your desired field.
Building confidence and self esteem
is also crucial in overcoming these limiting
beliefs. Remember, you're powerful.
You're capable with tons of
wealth and experience and knowledge that you can offer to the
world. So let's talk
about the power of self talk and self
compassion. So our internal
dialogue can have a profound impact on our emotions,
our behaviors, and overall well-being.
If we're constantly berating and criticizing ourselves,
it can lead to anxiety, to low self esteem,
and a whole host of mental health challenges.
So some examples of negative self talk are,
I'm too old to try new things, and this can lead
to a fear of taking risk and missed
opportunities for growth, or I'm not good
enough. Self doubt and low self esteem
can impact our motivation, our relationships,
and overall well-being, or
I'll never be able to do that. This
limiting belief can become a
self fulfilling prophecy that
prevents us from even trying.
Negative self talk can perpetuate anxiety,
depression, and a lack of self confidence.
It can also strain our relationships
as we project our inner critic onto others.
So that's why it's important to cultivate a
kind, nurturing inner voice, one that
treats us with the same compassion and understanding that
we'd offer a friend. When we practice self
compassion, we create a
safe space within ourselves for healing, for growth,
and self acceptance.
Positive affirmations and mantras can also be
helpful in reprogramming our subconscious minds
and creating a more, let's say, a more
supportive inner dialogue. So some
examples of positive affirmations would
be, I am worthy of love, happiness,
and success. I embrace my
authentic self without apology. I
am strong, resilient, and capable of overcoming
any challenge. My age is an
asset, bringing wisdom and experience to everything I
do. I am constantly growing,
evolving, and becoming the best version of myself.
Now try creating some affirmations of your own.
Positive affirmations can help as to rewire
our thoughts, to boost self confidence and to
counter negative self talk, repeat them
regularly, especially during the times when
you're facing self doubt. Now let's talk
about those major life transitions
that can totally shake things up, whether
it's the empty nest, retirement, or
taking on new caregiving roles, these
changes can be both exciting and daunting.
So if you're dealing with the empty nest, then
know that the feelings of sadness, of loss, and
even identity crisis are completely normal.
You're fixed with trying to to figure out
what's next, but be gentle with yourself
and remember that this transition
also offers an opportunity to rediscover
your personal passions and redefine your sense
of self. A few tips for coping
are rediscover old hobbies, interests, or passions
that you may have set aside while raising children. This can
help redefine your identity beyond motherhood
or explore new experiences, classes, or activities that
excite you and allow personal growth.
Maybe strengthen connections with friends, family who
can relate to the empty nest experience. Now
most in my circle have experienced this whole empty
nest syndrome. So we're all at about the same stage of
life. And then consider volunteering
or pursuing a long held dream
using your newfound time and energy.
Now retirement is another major transition that can bring
up mixed emotions. On the one hand,
it's a chance to finally enjoy the freedom and
leisure that you've worked so hard for. But
then on the other, it can feel like a loss of
purpose and routine. While I
think I still have a few years before retirement, I've actually
been reading up on how to prepare it excuse
me, prepare for it, not just financially,
but emotionally. And here's what I found.
Start envisioning your ideal retirement life
well before your last day of work. What hobbies,
travels, or projects would you like to pursue?
If you can, gradually adjust your
routine and your schedule to simulate the lack of
structure that comes with retirement.
Explore ways to stay mentally and physically
active, such as taking classes, volunteering, or
joining social clubs. Reframe
retirement as an opportunity of new beginnings and
personal growth rather than an ending.
Embrace the journey and stay open to the new possibilities that
await you. I think,
I've told you that you can go to my website and leave me a voice
message. Right? I honestly love to
hear from you. One listener recently left me
a message with a question about empty nesting,
and it was based on the empty nest episode
number 19 that I did. Check it out if you haven't
done so. But I thought this question was a good one
to share in this, episode. And so her
question is, I've
been really struggling with anxiety since
becoming an empty nester last year. My kids were
my whole world, and now I'm not sure who
I am without them at home. How can I cope with this
identity shift? Well, you know what?
Again, I think we've we all who are empty nesters
experienced this in some way or another in that
our kids, or in my case, kid, really was our
whole world. When you think about it, every day
for however many years, 18 years, 21 years, depending
on what when they left, every day,
our routines and our lives were centered
around them and their needs from birth to
when they left to go to college or got married or moved into their
own apartment. So the empty nest transition
can absolutely trigger an identity crisis,
which is completely valid and normal to fill.
So for so many years, your role as a mother was your
primary focus and sense of purpose. It's natural to
experience some questioning when that identity shifts.
Trust me. I went through a range of emotions
too. 1st, though, be gentle with
yourself as you navigate this major life change.
Allow yourself to fully feel and process
the range of emotions, sadness, loneliness,
pride at the job well done raising your kids.
Don't resist or judge the feelings as
you need them or you need
to feel them in order to heal.
Next, see this as an opportunity for
rediscovery. Who were you before you
became a mother? What hopes and
dreams and interests did you once have that you
can now explore. Spend some time
journaling about your values, your passions, and
your goals for this next chapter.
It can also be helpful to fill that nurturing
role in new ways, like volunteering,
mentoring others, or nurturing personal creative projects
that you're passionate about, Connecting with loved ones
and expanding your social circle is also key.
Most importantly, know that this
identity shift, it's only temporary as you
transition to your second act. With
patience, self compassion, and openness to
growth, you'll begin feeling grounded in your sense of self
again. This, it can be
a time of blossoming into an even
more authentic version of yourself.
Well, girl, there you have it. I hope this
look into nurturing our mental health as women over
50 has provided valuable
insights and practical strategies that
you can implement in your own life. At the end of the
day, prioritizing our mental well-being
isn't just important. It's essential for
living our fullest, most vibrant lives during this
remarkable state. As we wrap
up, let's recap 5 top takeaways for
boosting and protecting our mental health. Number
1 would be reframe societal narratives
about aging and embrace your hard earned
wisdom. Number 2, cultivate a
growth mindset and a belief in your ability to
keep evolving. Number 3,
challenge limiting beliefs and negative self talk
4, build self confidence and
silence that inner critic. And 5,
see life changes as opportunities for self
discovery and growth. These
takeaways are, let's call them guidepost
for nurturing your mental health during this stage of
life. They aren't just words that are coming out of my mouth.
They are powerful mindset shifts and habits that
can transform how you feel, how you think,
and and how you show up for yourself. So
keep them close, put them into
practice, and know that I'm
cheering you on in this journey of growth, self
actualization, and most importantly, mental
well-being. Until next time, keep
shining bright and take care of your
beautiful mind. And remember, we are in this
together.
Thanks for hanging out with me today. I hope you're feeling
inspired and ready to own your awesomeness. I love
sharing this space with you, and if you loved today's episode,
do me a favor, share it with a friend who could use some
extra inspiration. A quick rating and review
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Until next time, keep shining with grace,
style, and a whole lot of sass.